‘Very demure, very mindful’: What started the latest TikTok trend?

Next season’s style mood majors on timeless and polished pieces with a ladylike bent. Photo / Getty Images
A tongue-in-cheek TikTok trend has sparked a passion for good manners and timeless fashion – here’s how to get the look.
Forget pulling your socks up to mid-calf, if you really want to be with it this summer, it’s all about being “demure”.
The latest buzzword to sweep social media, the term has gone viral as influencers use it to promote the idea of being “very mindful” and “respectful” in everyday situations. Search Gen Z’s go-to social media platform, TikTok, and you’ll find instructional videos on how to be demure for almost every occasion, from applying perfume to watering your hanging baskets.
The trend exploded after TikTok creator Jools Lebron, who has over 1.7 million followers, posted a satirical video to her channel detailing her conservative and “modest” approach to workplace makeup.
#fyp #demure
“You see how I do my make-up for work? Very demure. Very mindful,” Lebron says in the video. “I don’t come to work with a green-cut crease. I don’t look like a clown when I go to work. I don’t do too much. I’m very mindful while I’m at work. You see how I look very presentable? The way I came to the interview is the way I go to the job.”
Since the video was posted at the start of August, it has racked up over 10 million views and inspired a host of tongue-in-cheek etiquette videos. Ever wondered how to be demure when walking through the airport or eating a doughnut? A quick scroll on social media will tell you.
The demure movement has even infiltrated global music taste. According to a Spotify post published on its Instagram account last week, the streaming service has seen a 1000% rise in searches for “demure” playlists, with Lana Del Rey and Billie Eilish among the most popular artists.
If you’re starting to think this all sounds ridiculous, you’d be right. The demure trend is a humorous send-up of other social media movements that champion a wholesome approach, such as the hugely popular “clean girl” aesthetic which centres around an effortless, no makeup look and pastimes such as meditation. (Consider Gwyneth Paltrow the ultimate clean girl).
There are also parallels with the divisive “trad wife” movement, which promotes domesticity and a hyper-feminine style. Think, baking sourdough from scratch in milkmaid plaits.
Satirical social videos aside, the demure trend chimes with what’s happening in the fashion sphere, especially as we head towards the autumn. An evolution of the pared-back, quiet luxury look, next season’s style mood majors on timeless and polished pieces with a ladylike bent. Neat tailored skirt suits, kitten heels and heritage tweeds straight out of Elizabeth II’s Balmoral wardrobe are key looks.
At Net-a-Porter, demure-adjacent styles are already proving popular. The luxury e-tailer has seen a 1005 increase in searches for pussybow blouses over the last three months, while searches for frame bags have risen by 100% in the last month.
“Wearing a beautiful, feminine dress makes me feel empowered and like the best me,” says designer Alice Naylor-Leyland, who is known for her elegant personal style and cites Grace Kelly among her sartorial inspirations.
In fact, if you’ve been mourning the death of the floral midi dress, this trend is perfect, as both longer lengths and classic florals tie in with a demure look. Naylor-Leyland’s go-to labels are Carolina Herrera and royal favourite, Emilia Wickstead.
You don’t need to spend on designer labels though. Cefinn and O’Pioneers are a trove of chic florals. Pretty Woman polka-dots are also having a moment – look at Ghost. Me + Em’s rose-pink ponte A-line midi is perfect for transeasonal officewear.
On the subject of smart dress codes, Jackie Kennedy-esque column skirts are both refined and sharp, as demonstrated by Loro Piana and Max Mara on the AW24 catwalks. Try Whistles’ tailored midi teamed with a blouse and Mary Jane flats.
If your 9-5 preference is trousers, Wyse London’s check blazer and matching trousers have an air of Brideshead Revisited. Tie a printed silk foulard around your shoulders, or onto your top-handle bag.
This understated look extends into casual wear, too. Just look to the Princess of Wales, who epitomises modern demure dressing, for inspiration. In a recent video congratulating Team GB for their Olympic success, Kate wore a classic Breton top, plain gold chain necklace and elegant eternity band in place of her more extravagant engagement ring. Astrid & Miyu’s solid gold emerald baguette band is similarly tasteful and bling-free. Although her bottom half wasn’t on display, it’s likely the Princess was wearing her signature straight-cut jeans and simple white trainers from Superga or Veja.
“The key [to a polished and chic casual look] is to have great staples that fit you well and go together,” says Naylor-Leyland who relies on feminine jackets and knitwear from Bella Freud. Aligne’s waisted Daphine jacket would pair stylishly with indigo jeans or a denim midi. If trainers feel too scruffy, try an elegant ankle boot: “I recently found a pair of amazing brown suede ankle boots from La Redoute which I wear most days.” says Naylor-Leyland.